If We Have Faith in the Universe, Miracles Might Happen

CHILDREN OF THE ’90s!!! It’s time to double up on your Depends because y’all are about to shit your shorts. You may have thought you’d reached the pinnacle of human happiness after the NKOTBSB tour, but it’s about to get a whole lot better because according to the undisputed cutest member of the Backstreet Boys, BSB AND THE SPICE GIRLS MAY GO ON TOUR TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I would expect that tickets for this once in a lifetime tour will be pretty pricey, so I’ve put together some re-purposed lyrics from the two groups that you can casually slip into conversation with your more solvent loved ones in order to cajole them into satisfying your heart’s greatest desire:

  • I don’t care who you are, where you’re from, what you did, as long as you buy me tickets to this concert.
  • If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get me tickets to this concert.
  • You are my fire, my one desire, believe when I say oh ha ha just kidding, my one desire is to go to this concert!
  • I’m giving you everything, all that joy can bring, this I swear. And all that I want from you is a promise you will buy me tickets to this concert.
  • Everybody, yeah, rock your body, yeah, everybody rock your body right, BUY ME TICKETS TO THIS GODDAMN CONCERT, ALRIGHT????
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About catweazle

Catweazle is an 11th century wizard trying to make his way through the modern world while living in a disused water tower with his pet toad.
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12 Responses to If We Have Faith in the Universe, Miracles Might Happen

  1. old man fatima says:

    I love posh’s face in that photo… so high fashion.

  2. So, one of the greatest moments of my life was a few years ago, when I was at a jam-packed club dancing with friends (usually the kind of environment that I avoid, but I do occasionally venture outside to consort with other humans) and I Want It That Way started playing. Every single person in the club, guys and gals, started singing at the top of their lungs while dancing, for the whole song. It was transcendent.

  3. collin0truckasaurus says:

    I would like to see the crowd makeup at this show, but less than I want to actually go to this show.

  4. flanny says:

    It seems weird that Averil Lavigne is supporting BSB in their current tour. Do their audiences overlap?

    • Commentatrix says:

      You mean former punky tweens and former regular tweens? I would guess they might all have found common ground… At the playground! You know with their children! ‘Cause it’s much later now?

  5. Casey says:

    They should call the tour (and its official fragrance) Backstreet Spice!

    • summerestherson says:

      HUSSHHHHHHHHH now, Carmen. Don’t remind us that our Grumpy Dad is looking down on us in displeasure from Blog Heaven.

    • catweazle says:

      My excitement about this potential concert is not due to nostalgia but enduring love, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

  6. oh would go to thisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss. I saw BSB in 1998 and my dad gave me the spice girls cd for valetines day before they were even huge. Thanks dad

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