In case you haven’t heard yet, CBS just announced that Stephen Colbert will be replacing David Letterman on The Late Show after he retires in 2015. This shouldn’t come as a surprise for anyone who has been following the story closely as CBS had allegedly been talking to Colbert long before Letterman’s official announcement. Before I go into my usual complaint, I’d like to say that I’m very happy for both Letterman and Colbert because I believe they are both very funny people who deserve their success. When I was a kid, my friend auditioned for Stupid Human Tricks and I was in charge of calling to describe her talent and convince the producers that we were worth their time. Here’s where the story gets hilarious and nostalgia-ridden about the joys of three-way calling in the 90s! I tried to call with my friend (the one with the trick) on three-way so she could add in stuff or at least listen to how I did. I wrote out my phone call very very carefully so as to include some great descriptions as well as great jokes! I said everything perfectly and hung up, transferring the call to just me and my friend where I then freaked the fuck out about how nervous I was and how awesome it would be to go on the show. Classic 90s twist — the phone DIDN’T transfer just to me and my friend and my nervous freak out had been recording on the audition call the WHOLE TIME! We got a call back and went to audition, but didn’t make the show.
All this to say that I love both comedians and both have had a great impact on all of our lives, but it’s time for a change! The problem is that no network late night program is going to be able to cast an unknown/inexperienced host and all the current late night hosts are middle-aged white dudes in suits already. Chelsea Handler is an obvious exception, but I doubt CBS would consider her at all. There was also talk that Ellen Degeneres was on the list and I saw one article that included Whoopi Goldberg as well. Neither would be bad as late night host, I don’t think, but both do pretty well in their current jobs. I think what we really need are more women and people of color in late night in general.
Once Colbert moves to CBS, Comedy Central has an opportunity to launch someone new in that 11:30 slot (unless they want to move @midnight up a half hour and rename it I guess?). Let’s talk about who might be great for a new 11:30 show!
- Samantha Bee: She’s great on The Daily Show and it’s very likely Comedy Central will promote from within
- Tina Fey & Amy Poehler: duh duh duh
- Jessica Williams: again, KILLING IT on The Daily Show
- Tracy Morgan: Please, SOMEONE give this guy a talk show!
- Aasif Mandvi or Wyatt Cynac: this list is a little Daily Show heavy, but really they’re all great!
- Mindy Kaling: This would mean her sitcom got canceled and IN NO WAY do I want that
- Retta: Again, please let her stay on Parks & Rec, but in case she’s looking for a job, let’s all watch her watch stuff!
What are your ideas?