Catfishing for a New Phone

Once upon a time there was a young boy who met a very attractive lady on the internet.  The lady was beautiful with a “bangin” body and seemed to be very cool and exactly what this boy was looking for.  So next, of course, he drove to meet her because by this point he really thought he was in love!  Turns out the woman he thought he was talking to was actually an older lady with a family who didn’t look anything like those photos.  Catfished!!  At the time, this was very revolutionary that someone could lie on the internet, but since then, we’ve discovered that (SPOILER!) it happens all the time.

I found the Catfish movie completely engrossing and I have to say that the show often reaches that same level of intrigue.  Wednesday’s episode was a little bit different and it kind of blew me away.  Most of the time, we find people who are pretending to be someone else because of an insecurity they have about themselves.  We also tend to see a lot of stories where someone is trying to get revenge and joke-sexting with someone is a pretty great way to get revenge, if you ask me.  So let’s talk about what went wrong in this most recent episode (spoilers beyond this point!).

This week we met Lucille who met a musician (probably!) online and helped set up a bunch of gig-related services (limo, security, etc.) for this guy and then no one got paid.  This guy never made any music and there are a bunch of hilarious moments of Max using his phone to double-check that these songs don’t belong to this guy.  I guess I have a bunch of questions:

  • Why?
  • Seriously, what does he get out of faking a music career to steal $14,000 of security from some random security firm?
  • How dumb does this guy think Nev & Max are?
  • How dumb actually are Nev & Max?
  • Can you believe Nev threw his phone in the water?
  • Do you think it’ll be caught by a loose seal?
  • How often have you wanted to throw someone’s phone into a nearby body of water?

Feel free to add your own questions about this or other episodes of Catfish in the comments.  As a bonus, if you have ever catfished or been catfished, please tell your story!

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About collin0truckasaurus

Truck is a fan of cheeseburgers, gifs of cats, and saying the F word. She has lived a bunch of different places but the internet is by far her favorite. Her main complaint in life is that food noted as "spicy" on a menu is never spicy enough.
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25 Responses to Catfishing for a New Phone

  1. I know someone who was catfished, and the person (catfisher?) ended up being really unhinged and scary. Fortunately, it never came to anything, but yeah, trust no one, everybody. Except me. You can TOTALLY trust me.

  2. artdorkgirl says:

    The only question I can answer with certainty is the last one. I pretty much want to throw someone’s phone everyday. Yesterday it was the girl in the back of my class who thought I couldn’t see her. Guess what, girlie! I totally saw you.

  3. catweazle says:

    I haven’t been catfished to my knowledge, but I did have an online boyfriend in the AOL days who had the screenname “Pred86” which in retrospect leads me to believe that he was a really dumb child predator. But I never tried to meet him IRL, I just wrote about him in my diary all the time.

    • Back when I was super into Lord of the Rings and had aol, so age 14ish, I chatted with some 40 year-old businessman that I met on the LOTR boards. We only talked about Lord of the Rings stuff and he fully admitted to being a 40 year-old man who was married with a family, but in retrospect it’s a little weird. It’s probably a lot of weird. I can’t really tell.

    • artdorkgirl says:

      Or else he was the Predator. Did he have a tell-tale shimmer? (sorry, I just watched that episode of Archer last night.)

  4. Erika says:

    It’s happened to a couple of friends of mine. One of the stories even happened through snail mail (it was the late ’90s, so the Internet wasn’t as widespread as it is now). My housemate was catfished by a woman who claimed to originally be from our area. And, in that respect, she was very believable. She either did live here once, or she was a good researcher. It got to the point where my housemate drove to the airport to pick her new ladyfriend up. At that point, the jig was up. The woman wasn’t on the plane, and ultimately she confessed to lying.

    My other friend had a pen pal “relationship” supposedly with a woman, but who really knows. He also was conned into going to the airport to pick her up, but she didn’t show, and he never heard from her again. In the latter case, even going by how my friend tells it, there were so many red flags, and I think he wouldn’t have been hoodwinked had he not been desperate for a girlfriend. He didn’t even know what his pen pal looked like. “She” never even went so far as to send him a fake picture.

    • At least they just drove to the airport, unless the airport is really far away.

      • Erika says:

        Fortunately my housemate just had to suffer a 20-minute drive, but my guy friend who was catfished didn’t own a car. So I can only assume he had to take the bus to the airport. Having been without a car myself for many years, that would have been a serious sticking point for me. “I had to suffer the bus for 40 minutes for this?”

  5. FRQ says:

    I have no experience being catfished, but I did start watching Playing House, and I’m definitely a fan. (This week’s episode is relevant to this post)

  6. catweazle says:

    Oh I do know somebody who got not quite catfished but certainly duped in a catfish-like manner. It’s a long, soap-operatic story but basically he had a whirlwind romance with this chick who seemed super awesome and they started living together after a very short amount of time, but she had some kind of serious terminal illness and had to get emergency surgery and he got a call from a nurse saying she had died on the table but then miraculously came back and it made him believe in god, etc etc, but then it turned out that she wasn’t sick except in the sense that she was a pathological liar and made everything up and stole medical supplies to back up her illness story and used a fake voice to impersonate a nurse and all this crazy shit. It was bananas but tbh that guy is a jerk and kind of deserved it.

    • that is all kinds of crazy

    • Erika says:

      Sounds like Munchausen. I’ve heard some dual catfishing/Munchausen stories before where people claimed to be someone they’re not on the internet and also claimed a serious illness for attention and money. It would often go as far as the person stealing or buying medical supplies to set up fake hospital photos.

      Just goes to show you shouldn’t completely trust anyone online.

  7. You guys, I hate to be “that person” but is anyone else a little suspicious that Mr. Tumnus might not be the REAL Mr. Tumnus?

  8. Does pretending to be someone else in a chatroom when your 12 count as catfishing people?

  9. Also i feel like Nev has been more of a loose cannon this season, like when he was yelling at the one girl and the producers were like yo what are you even doing.

  10. whatisabadger says:

    So this is exactly the post to talk about the guy who’s maybe trying to catfish…my high school graduating class? Sorry this is so late. Anyways here’s the facts so far:
    1. I got a facebook friend request last week from some dude I’d never heard of, but it said he went to my high school and was about my age. I asked my friend with a yearbook to look him up, but he wasn’t there (in our year or any adjacent years).
    2. I accepted the request for fun (a few other people from my high school had already), and first thing I noticed was his facebook was created like 3 days prior. I sent him a message to the effect of, ‘welcome to facebook, do I know you?’ and he said he wasn’t actually new to facebook, his crazy ex took over his last account so he had to deactivate and make this one. Also, he got pulled out of school senior year for getting into a fight so he didn’t graduate there (he’s not in the junior year yearbook either).
    3. Finding all this very suspicious, I went to reverse google-image some of his pics, and eventually found someone with all his photos and then some (with a completely different name, in a different state). WELL THEN.
    4. So now I was super intrigued, and started digging a little with my questions, I asked what teachers he had, and he was like ‘I have to go to a meeting’ (hahahahaha oookay) and a few hours later came back with some names that I’d never heard of, and said he was in special ed. My friend found all the teachers mentioned in the online school directory, under special ed as mentioned. BUT, the one whose resume I managed to find on linkedin only started working there last year. NICE TRY, DUDE.
    5. During these conversations he also told me about this “super addictive new game” he just found called Farmville. In 2014??? Are you kidding me???? Also, he stopped going to my school when “momma bear” “yanked” him out after getting in “a scrap”. I’m 25 and went to high school in California and I can say with 100% confidence that noooobody remotely near that demographic talks like that. (The alleged bully he got in a fight with was “a lumpy looking blonde fella named Steve”). His messages all basically sound like they’re coming from a 45 year old embarrassing uncle.

    …..so that’s most of the story so far, sorry it was waaay long. Why is he doing this??? He’s not like trying to ask for anything from me, I had to initiate all these convos. Also, half his friends are farmville bots?? WHO IS THIS PERSON???

    • That’s really weird. Some old dude trying to recapture lost youth? Maybe someone trying to spy on some people in your class for someone else? (Or someone from the class who made a new profile to spy for themselves?)

      • whatisabadger says:

        I feel like it’s definitely some old dude. Also, the other people from my class have mostly defriended or been defriended…

  11. hahhaah “we’ll buy you a new phone” hahhaha good for nev hahahahahahha

  12. mydumbopiniongoeshere says:

    The most Catfishy thing I’ve ever heard about was some con man who would call up NYC classical music people and claim to be Elliott Carter (a famous american composer who was in his 90s at the time). He would say that he was stuck at the airport and needed money. It was so weirdly specific that it seemed like it had to be another person in the industry who was getting off on it.

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