Scott Patterson Broke My Heart

It is with a heavy heart that I inform you that Scott Patterson (aka Luke Danes) recently went on a podcast called “Gilmore Guys” and made some shocking declarations. The aforelinked article lists the top seven tidbits from the podcast but I’m going to distill them here into the top four things that made me go “LUKE NOOOOO!”

1. He tried to instill false hope in us about a potential Gilmore Girls renunion.

I will say this, there are talks going on at the moment. I can’t really go into any details, but there is some activity. I’m hopeful, and I’m in. I think it would be a big event, and I think it would be a great fan celebration.

Let’s be real here. He has probably just been texting with the guy who plays Taylor Doose about throwing a Gilmore Girls themed barbecue at the local VFW. Which I would totally go to, but please don’t pretend there’s going to be a movie. Rory is married to Pete Campbell now, she’s clearly too big.

2. He is Team Dean

He was the original one. He was the most soulful and the most poetic. I think it was Dean. But Jess was so obviously the wrong one — he was so obviously the train wreck. He was the fling that she had to have. It was always Dean because he was so in love with her.

The English language does not contain the words to express how much I loathe Dean, so this is very disappointing to hear. Ever since I dated a guy who liked Dean and decided to ignore the red flag and just be happy he liked Gilmore Girls I have been very wary of any male who doesn’t see Dean for the turd that he is, because that guy turned out to be terrible. You’re on thin ice, Patterson.

3. Though he was in a relationship while Gilmore Girls was on the air, he claims Lauren Graham was totally his type

“I was seeing somebody the whole time. I was very stable in my relationship. It got me through [the show] sane,” he said. He added, though, that Lauren Graham “was my kind of gal: pretty, smart, funny.”

Nice try, pal, but we all know the truth!

4. He is a confessed prankist

I’m a bit of a practical joker. I used to like to put shaving cream in Milo’s shoes. I once nailed Milo’s shoes to the floor. I used to put vaseline on Milo’s toilet seat in his trailer. I knew he could take it. He’d get back at me, but I’m not going to tell you how.

Not that Milo Ventimiglia didn’t probably deserve shaving cream in his shoes but come on, guy. Who do you think you are, George Clooney? I do have some theories on how Milo got back at him, though. Please vote for what you think is likeliest.

About catweazle

Catweazle is an 11th century wizard trying to make his way through the modern world while living in a disused water tower with his pet toad.
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8 Responses to Scott Patterson Broke My Heart

  1. flanny says:

    I listen to Gilmore Guys while I run, and it is great! Last episode (I believe) they had the casting directors on and they were both delights AND BOTH TEAM LOGAN!!!!!

    • welcometocostcoiloveyou says:

      I didn’t like Logan very much, but even he is better than Dean. Come one Scott Patterson, Dean?

  2. artdorkgirl says:

    #3 is just sort of a weird thing to say out loud. What is to be gained there? Your ex will hate you and Lauren Graham will probably think you’re weird.

    • welcometocostcoiloveyou says:

      “My girlfriend was really supportive of my career, but if my coworker would have given me the green light, girlfriend would be out door!” Yuck. No wonder he likes Dean.

  3. mikaelajm says:

    Uh, what kind of dad is like “nah, that other guy is totes right for her” about the love of his son’s life? Cool dad.

  4. Ugh, Dean. This just reiterates that bullshit “if you just love her enough, she’ll love you eventually” like love is so totally one sided and all a girl cares about is being loved by a boring loser. And if you push your love on her enough, eventually you’ll wear her down bullshit. Dean sucks so much.

  5. Sota says:

    I never really was 100% for any of Rory’s men. I kinda wish that she had liked Marty more to see what that would have been like, and that he didn’t act weird in the end.

  6. Sota says:

    They should know that there is no way any reunion could happen now that Edward Hermann passed away. Without the whole Gilmore fam, it just wouldn’t be the same.

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