Homeless Monsters Tournament of Hotties: Other Non-North American Foxes Round Two

And the sexy wheel keeps on a-turnin’! Today we shall judge the victors of the first round of the Non-North American Foxes division.

Alfonso Herrera (16) vs. Sam Heughan (8)

Our first matchup is between a couple of relative unknowns who have recently come to semi-prominence in popular TV shows. First is Alfonso Herrera, a smokin’ hot Mexican actor who was gifted to us by the show Sense8, in which he plays Lito’s literally perfect boyfriend Hernando. If you’ve been on the fence about watching Sense8, please take into account that Mr. Herrera is involved in a number of sex scenes.

The sex scene thing is also true of Sam Heugan, I think? I have never watched his show, Outlander, but I am given to believe that it is very good and that he makes people feel surprising new feelings in their pantaloons.


Alexander Skarsgard (5) vs. Gael Garcia Bernal (4)

Speaking of simulating sexual intercourse on television, our next pair includes Alexander Skarsgard, whose bare butt should have gotten its own credit in his years on True Blood (leading some of us to watch that show for many seasons longer than it was worth watching).

I don’t know if Gael Garcia Bernal gets naked at all on his current show, Mozart In The Jungle, or not but I hope he does because a) I intend to watch it one day and that would be nice to see, and b) It would make for some great thematic unity between all the dudes in this round so far. Anyway, naked or not, the man is a hunk of burning love.


David Tennant (6) vs. Godfrey Gao (14)

Is the 10th Doctor #1 in your heart? When he says “Allons-y!” do you imagine that he’s gesturing toward the bedroom? Are you a monster and therefore attracted to Kilgrave? Then you will probably enjoy this photo.

Usually I don’t find dudes hot if I don’t have some kind of context in which to place them, be it a movie, TV show, longer-than-average commercial, whatever, but such is the beauty of Godfrey’s face that mere GIFs were able to make me swoon. We may not know who the fuck he is but who cares when he looks like this?


Rodrigo Santoro (10) vs. Ewan McGregor (2)

Do you all regret not voting for Diego Luna after the Rogue One trailer reminded us all how beautiful he is? YOU SHOULD! Not that Rodrigo Santoro isn’t plenty foxy in his own right, of course. Speaking of which…

Ewan McGregor is the rare man who manages to be equal parts lovable boy-next-door and filthy sexpot. He’s been in romantic comedies, family films and blockbusters, but you cannot google the man without also seeingĀ collages of his many full frontal scenes. God bless you, Ewan.


Voting will close at 11PM ET on Monday!


About catweazle

Catweazle is an 11th century wizard trying to make his way through the modern world while living in a disused water tower with his pet toad.
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15 Responses to Homeless Monsters Tournament of Hotties: Other Non-North American Foxes Round Two

  1. artdorkgirl says:

    Does anyone else feel like this is a really tough round? I went for my gut, but some of these were so hard (I’m sorry David Tennant. I’m so, so sorry.)

  2. flanny says:

    I thought Sam Heugan was Smith Jared in that pic. Is he? I didn’t IMDB him.

  3. nastyemu says:

    This is the second consecutive grouping where I don’t know who half the people are. Let me know when it’s time to vote for Michael Shannon.

    • catweazle says:

      Monday, probably!

    • Sota says:

      I don’t know most of them either. That doesn’t stop me from randomly choosing one or the other on a whim. Try it! It’s fun!

      • catweazle says:

        The great thing about this competition is that it is based on completely shallow criteria! Just look at the pictures and decide who’s hotter! No prior knowledge necessary!

        • nastyemu says:

          My vote goes to the one I think I would rather hang out with, and that’s tough if I know nothing about them. Unless there’s also a dog in the picture, which means I would rather hang out with that dude because I could just play with the dog and have a really great day. (Congrats on your vote, Rodrigo Santoro)

    • collin0truckasaurus says:

      Oh yeah, you gotta go with the hotness gut!

  4. hotspur says:

    Once again, the Trainspotting Rule makes this easy. I cast only one vote, and I am sure I did so properly.

  5. martinmegz says:

    You guys are crazy! Sam LastnameIcantspellstartswithH is so hot. Sooooo hot. Women follow him around crying at his hotness. He was on Kelly and Michael recently and all these women in the audience had camped out to get tickets and they almost fainted when he came out. So there.

    Also I think of Alexander Swedishlastname as Taylor Kitsch’s older brother in Battleship, which was a very entertaining movie that is unfairly maligned. Anyhow, I very much enjoy being forced to form opinions on hot guys so I love this tournament.

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