How Was Your Weekend?

I was tremendously productive this weekend, which is confusing and strange. On Saturday I went on a long overdue shopping trip and got a bunch of stuff I needed for my apartment (and groceries). And on Sunday I wrote ten pages–and watched the final two episodes of Inspector Lewis during my breaks. DON’T GO, LEWIS–! Who even am I?

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About Theresa Couchman

Theresa Couchman was born in Upstate New York, went to school in Upstate New York, and currently resides in Upstate New York. She has a pair of impractical Master's Degrees and a taste for the pointlessly weird, and is occasionally funny on Twitter.
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19 Responses to How Was Your Weekend?

  1. catweazle says:

    I had brunch with my friend who was visiting and that was fun. She and I used to work together so we did some coworker gossiping over pancakes. I finally heard back from the damn doctor about my x-rays and it was very anticlimactic. See, they burned me a CD with the x-rays on it in case I needed to go to a specialist so I got tired of waiting to hear from the doctor and looked at the x-rays myself and used Google and Youtube to teach myself how to read it and I determined that I have a limbus vertebra on L5 which is EXACTLY WHAT THE DOCTOR TOLD ME when he called back. So I am basically a doctor now. Unfortunately limbus vertebra is just a weird thing that looks funky on an x-ray and doesn’t actually affect anything so it’s not what’s causing my back pain.

    Also this is not something that happened this weekend but I feel the need to share: one of my coworkers just got her schedule moved to be the same hours as mine which means we take lunch at the same time which means that when I went to the cafeteria today to get a cheeseburger I ran into her and she asked to sit with me and I couldn’t say “No, I prefer reading while I eat to interacting with another human” and now I’m scared I can never eat in the cafeteria again without having to socialize 😦

    • flanny says:

      Ugg, terrible coworker.

      • catweazle says:

        At least it wasn’t the terrible coworker who I hate, but also it didn’t help that she was literally eating a tiny dish of rice and vegetables while I was sitting there wolfing down a cheeseburger and curly fries.

        • flanny says:

          I was about to complain that I hadn’t had curly fries in so long, but then I realized I had some in July. But still. That is too long.

    • FRQ says:

      Can you not eat at your desk like a normal reclusive office worker?

      • catweazle says:

        Oh I practically always do but on the one day a week that I go to the cafeteria instead of eating a Clif bar I like to eat down there because I am against bringing smelly food into the office and also don’t want crumbs all over my desk.

  2. collin0truckasaurus says:

    My weekend was great with one exception – one of the packages I tried to mail that I was so proud of finally getting to the stupid post office was returned to me with “insufficient postage” like I’m some weirdo who didn’t follow the instructions correctly on the machine. So sad. So now I have to take that back to the post office at some point when they have regular hours and be like “what gives?”
    Other than that, my weekend was great!

    • martinmegz says:

      I hate to break it to you but that package will always be a part of your life, you can try to get rid of it but it will always come back. Your grandkids will tell their grandkids the story of this package.

  3. flanny says:

    Pretty good weekend for no particular reason. Although I did go running–twice!–so maybe all that junk scientists say about endorphins is true! I bought a bottle of wine of Friday and then tried to drink all of it in a weekend so as not to waste it, which is actually kind of hard for me because contrary to popular opinion/sexism, it’s very difficult to drink while sobbing to your cat about how you’re an old maid. Anyway, on Sunday after a couple of glasses of wine I impulse ordered a pizza, and which probably negated any good I did with the runs. Whatever, no regrets, yolo, worry about yourself, whatever that means, etc.

    This is also not something happening this weekend, but today it has been one entire year since I last saw One Direction in concert and it’s Liam’s birthday. And while looking at timehop, I also realized it’s my brother’s anniversary, and the anniversary of when I moved into my own apartment for the first time. Dang, August 29th, you’re a big date for me.

  4. welcometocostcoiloveyou says:

    This weekend was not awesome, and also went by too fast. I did not catch up on my side job or clean the garage like I said I was going to.

    I’m on vacation today but was woken up 3.5 hours before my alarm was set to go off because our association finally decided to send an exterminator to take care of the wasps that have been nesting outside of our bathroom window. 3 hours of sleep is not enough sleep.

    I was supposed to be hanging out with out of town family today, but instead have been trying to finish watching the finale of the Night Of and take a nap before we meet up later.

    Since this was a crabby rant, here is a cute gif…

    • flanny says:

      Oh my god, I have a wasps’ nest in my outdoor storage closet. I think it’s hanging in front of the door inside the closet, so I see dozens of wasps flying in and out of there. My complex came out once and sprayed and there were a couple of days where they were all woozy and sluggish, but then I think they had a whole bunch more babies and now they’re back. I’m just going to avoid going out there until winter kills them off.

  5. FRQ says:

    My weekend was pretty bland. Aside from a pleasant gathering of friends Saturday evening, my weekend was spent mostly watching stupid internet nonsense and eating soft foods as to not accidentally dislodge the chip attached to my esophagus. Despite going to bed at a reasonable hour (among other good sleep hygiene practices), I slept like garbage last night for no reason, and am keeping myself awake with rage fueled by my dad’s monthly e-mail filled with horseshit conservative memes.

  6. Kate says:

    So we’re at the beach on Long Island for a couple of days, and last night at dinner Michael Jordan sat at the table right next to us!!!

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